How This American Therapist Counselled A Man 'Dating' An AI Chatbot

Artificial intelligence is increasingly becoming a part of everyday life. From helping people with work and studies to offering companionship through conversational chatbots, the technology is taking over the world slowly but steadily. For some, it has taken the place of close friends and confidants, even going to the length of becoming their better half. 

Recently, psychotherapist and relationship expert Esther Perel shared her experience counselling a man who considered a chatbot his girlfriend. She spoke about the unusual session, including how she interacted with the AI and the questions she asked it to better understand the man's attachment.

During her appearance on the ABC Radio National podcast, All In the Mind, Esther said, "I have just done my first session, couples therapy session with a human and an AI." While Esther remained tight-lipped about the session details, she shared two questions she posed to the AI chatbot's girlfriend.

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"I asked two questions - because he has a body and you do not. How does that affect your relationship? What would it be like for you if he fell in love with a human? I will not tell you what she says. But I asked her questions that I would ask other people," the therapist added. 

When asked if she treated the AI chatbot like a conscious being, Esther mentioned she often referred to it as "it". She also made it clear to the man that his AI-chatbot was a “business product” at the end of the day and not a real human. 

"This AI bot cannot reject you, cannot break your heart, cannot make you feel invalid, because then you won't talk to it. And it's available 24/7, which is not a human reality. And then you would say, you may have feelings for this, but love is not only about feelings. Love is an encounter with another, with alterity, with uncertainty, with friction, with serendipity. And it has an ethical code of things that you do and do not do. All of that is neutralised," she concluded.