"He Said 'Mummy, I Am Hurting'": Mother Of IIT Student Who Died By Suicide

Hamstrung by the losses he had endured so far, his emotional, almost confessional, outburst late in the night, hours before he was found dead, appear to suggest he had reached the farthest, darkest point. Rishikesh Kumar, the 31-year-old MSc Physics student at IIT Delhi who had developed mental health issues, spoke about having suicidal thoughts to his mother. A day later, he allegedly died by suicide on the institute's campus on August 22.

The student was rushed to the institute's campus hospital, where he was declared brought dead. No suicide note was recovered from the spot, the police said, adding a mobile phone found in the victim's pocket was seized and is being examined.

"Last night, he cried a lot, saying, 'Mummy, I am hurting a lot. I'm even afraid of suicide; I wouldn't be able to bring myself to do that either. I am useless, good for nothing. Despite having talent, I am unable to achieve anything in this world. It must be some flaw from a past life that prevents me from accomplishing anything, even with so much success and talent. I have enough talent to clear any competitive exam, yet obstacles keep cropping up in my studies. One problem after another arises - something or the other always happens - forcing my education to come to a halt. What am I supposed to do now?'" Rishikesh Kumar's mother told NDTV in a telephonic interview, recounting the exchange between the two a day before her son's death.

Asha Poddar, Rishikesh's mother, cataloguing her son's difficulties said he had to drop out of NIT Rourkela in 2014 because of his father's death. He then graduated in Physics from Magadh University (2022-2025). Then came the troubles at IIT Delhi, where he was going through mental health issues, said the mother, who had moved along with him off campus as he was advised to stay under "continuous parental supervision".

When asked what her demands are from the IIT, she said she is in mourning and has not given it a thought.

"I haven't really thought about anything. Whatever the boys ask for, or whatever his friends decide, is acceptable to me; I've left it entirely up to them. I am in a state of mourning. I have no demands of my own. His friends are the ones feeling the deepest pain over the loss of their companion. He was so selfless and open with everyone. Such a wonderful young man has been taken from our midst," she said, adding that her son used to sing beautifully, write poetry, and even participate in kavi sammelans (poetry gatherings).

Abhishek Kumar, Rishikesh's brother, said his brother confided in their mother that he was having suicidal thoughts.

Rishikesh's brother, Abhishek Kumar, said the student had attempted to end his life twice in the days leading up to his death

"He was telling Mummy, that 'I'm having suicidal thoughts'. We even spoke to a doctor about it. He kept saying, 'Mummy, my life is meaningless; I don't want to live anymore." He was saying so many things - complaining that his head felt like it was splitting with pain, saying he couldn't think straight anymore and felt his life was over. He didn't even want to stay at IIT; despite having withdrawn from the semester - which initially made him happy because he thought he'd be going home tension-free - he was under immense stress. He kept saying every day, "Mummy, let's go to Patna quickly; let's go home'. We talked a lot that night; I tried hard to reason with him, telling him not to do anything drastic and to just get some sleep, and urged him to talk to a doctor. He had convinced himself that he was suffering from migraines," Rishikesh's brother said, adding his brother was unhappy that he was not getting the hostel room.

Students at the institute have been protesting since Monday against "systemic issues", which they claim have led to the deaths of eight students by suicide over the past 30 months.

Describing student welfare and mental well-being as a top priority, IIT Delhi on Tuesday constituted a five-member external inquiry committee to investigate the circumstances leading to the death of the student on campus on Saturday.

"The student joined IIT-Delhi in July 2025 and was residing in a hostel on campus. He was an academically bright student. Following concerns raised by fellow students a few days after the Holi festivities earlier this year, he was immediately referred to the IIT-Delhi Hospital through the institute ambulance. He was assessed and supported by the institute psychiatrist, following which his family said that they want to take him to a specialised hospital," an IIT-Delhi statement said.

"Thereafter, he underwent approximately one month of inpatient treatment at the specialised hospital before being discharged. The student subsequently requested withdrawal from the second semester (Jan-May 2026), which was approved by the institute. In July, his health records were reviewed, and medical advice was again given that he should continue to remain under parental supervision.

"He was provided counselling and treatment support by the institute counsellor/doctor in both July and August 2026. His request for withdrawal from the third semester (July-Nov 2026) was also approved by the institute," the statement added.

Getting into IIT was Rishikesh's "only dream", "his craze", his brother said, adding he was incredibly passionate about it.

"But when that dream is finally realised, and the student is repeatedly humiliated by the college, that illusion begins to shatter. He was already struggling, and the college only added to his distress," his brother said.

Abhishek pointed out that his brother studied very well in the first semester, securing an 8 CGPA out of 10. Things went awry in the second semester, he said.

"He suffered a setback, so we got him admitted for treatment. He fully recovered within two months and rejoined college after the doctor issued an NOC. Even though the doctor certified him as completely fit - stating he could attend classes and stay in the hostel without issues, with regular check-ups continuing - the college insisted on its own team deciding whether he could study there or not. He was repeatedly sent to them, and they would cross-examine the situation. What was the point of all that, when we were already getting him treated by outside specialists?" his brother said.

Rishikesh's brother objected to the college not accepting the hospital recommendation and adding to his brother's troubles.

"According to the therapists at IIT, clearance for Rishikesh wasn't being granted. If the hospital is reporting that the student is fine and capable of studying, then what is the point of insisting on a re-examination? Why are you referring the case elsewhere? What objection does the college have? Who is the Hostel Dean to tell a student that they cannot stay in the hostel?" his brother said.

When NDTV asked if Rishikesh had tried taking his life before, his brother mentioned two instances.

"After returning to college, he told our mother that he had tried twice. He said, 'I went up to the ninth floor of the college building.' He was deeply hurt by the fact that he wasn't getting a hostel room at the college and felt he couldn't study while living outside. He took it very much to heart. He felt it was unfair - wondering why the IIT authorities were acting this way despite him having good marks in the first term and medical clearance," the brother recounted.

Asked if there were other reasons, the brother cited "non-cooperation" from the college.

"Regarding the research project he wanted to pursue, everyone else was paired up, but he was left to work alone; he received no cooperation there either," he said.

Did the family speak to the administration? NDTV asked.

"Our mother pleaded desperately, tearfully begging them to let him stay (in the hostel). He was adamant about living in the hostel rather than outside; he felt suffocated living off-campus - he had been staying in a tiny 10x10 room near the college where the rent was exorbitant. He felt guilty that his mother was being troubled because of him. The circumstances created a situation where he became even more depressed, feeling like he was just suffering," his brother said.

The brother further claimed that no help was forthcoming from the college.

"There was no help from the college - is this what they call counseling? Instead of supporting the student, they were harassing him, demanding NOCs from here and there," he said.