- Annaliese Holland chose voluntary assisted dying after battling a rare neurological disorder for years
- She was diagnosed with Autoimmune Autonomic Ganglionopathy, causing severe pain and organ failure
- Holland relied on intravenous feeding and endured multiple infections and hospitalizations
Annaliese Holland, a woman from Adelaide, South Australia, has chosen to end her life through voluntary assisted dying after years of battling a rare, incurable neurological disorder. According to New York Post, she was diagnosed at age 18 with Autoimmune Autonomic Ganglionopathy (AAG), a terminal neurological disorder in which the immune system attacks the nerves responsible for vital functions like heart rate, blood pressure, and digestion.
Much of her childhood was spent in hospitals with doctors unable to determine the cause of her illness. Over the years, her condition worsened, leaving her in constant pain, nausea, and daily vomiting. For the last decade, she has relied entirely on total parenteral nutrition (TPN), receiving all nourishment through intravenous feeding.
"My bowel acts as if it's blocked but there's nothing actually blocking it. It's just the nerves don't work so, as gross as this is, my stools would back up so much that I would throw it up or drain out my tummy," she told news.com.au.
"I had feeding tubes placed in me and I was still vomiting and then we discovered that my stomach wasn't emptying so I was put on TPN. Because of the line straight into your bloodstream, if you get an infection it turns to sepsis really quickly which is very, very, dangerous," she continued.
"Had Enough"
Her condition has led to multi-organ failure, a fractured spine, a split sternum, and other severe complications. She endures daily anxiety about the pain and the prospect of "starving to death" when her body can no longer be fed through IVs. She has also survived sepsis 25 times. After years of extensive treatments and hospital stays, Holland decided she has "had enough" and began the process for voluntary assisted dying (VAD).
"I was so miserable. You can't change it so you have to just deal with it really. Even though there's beautiful moments in my days, they are exhausting and long. I'm in chronic debilitating pain," she said.
"I missed out on formals, graduations, my 18th, 21st [birthdays], they were all in hospitals being really sick. All my friends, they're having babies, getting engaged, married. Everyone's life is moving and I'm just stuck. I'm not living. I'm surviving every day, which is tough," she added.
"Voluntary assisted dying" in Australia
Three weeks after consulting with psychologists and completing the necessary assessments, Annaliese was approved for voluntary assisted dying (VAD). She views the approval for VAD as a "safety blanket" and a source of peace, offering her a choice and control over her final moments. She describes the decision not as "giving up," but as a brave choice after a long fight.
Voluntary assisted dying, also known as medical aid in dying (MAID), is legal across all Australian states for terminally ill, mentally competent adults. Unlike euthanasia, which remains illegal, VAD and MAID involve the patient self-administering prescribed medication to peacefully end their life, rather than having a doctor perform the act.
Heartbreak for Family
Annaliese is keenly aware of the deep emotional struggle her father Patrick, mother Armanda, and sister Vickie are facing because of her decision. Her mother admitted that while she continues to hope for a miracle, she also understands the difficult reality her daughter is living with.
Meanwhile, her father is still struggling to come to terms with her decision, and the emotional toll has been heavy on the entire family. She recalled how her father stayed by her side through her most difficult moments - lying with her in the hospital bed, helping clean her up, administering pain medication when she couldn't, comforting her with hugs, wiping her tears, and holding her hand during sleepless nights.
Annie also remembered a late-night conversation in the kitchen, where she told her father that she had reached her limit. When he asked if she was giving up, she clarified that it wasn't about giving up, she had simply had enough.
For Patrick, a turning point in accepting her decision came after a critical hospital visit, when doctors had to resuscitate her. She pleaded with him, "Dad, please let me go. I will not hate you if you let me go."
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