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Deepali Mathur D'Mello is a teacher by vocation and a full-time mom. She has just moved to Gurgaon with her family.)
Rahul is 17 years old today.
The tears of joy wouldn't stop even though they brought him to me in a steel tray, not yet cleaned. Here was a little part of me that even after being separated from my body, would always remain a part of me.
His doctor used to call him the guy with the funny ears...and a genius! He was saying big words when he was just eight months old - like Gautam Buddh Nagar, Onomatopoeia. Constantinople at 1 year 8 months. Except, that she noticed that he would repeat things we said again and again.
She knew that something was amiss and guided us on the right path. He was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome, a form of high-functioning autism, when he was a little over two. Rahul received an early intervention -and look where he is today. Has completed a grade X ICSE examination from a mainstream school in Mumbai without the use of a scribe, securing 57 %!!
The day after his grandfather was cremated, he tackled his most difficult board exam subject - Economics.
My husband got a job in Gurgaon in June.
We got the impression that Delhi and Gurgaon schools are much more aware of special needs students, especially those with autism, and are keen on providing integrated learning.
We were wrong. Getting a child with special needs into a mainstream school is unbelievably difficult in Gurgaon. Even after he has cleared a board exam without a scribe. Schools do not appear to trust the opinion reflected in the Board Certificate for Rahul. They do not recognize the hard work and effort put in. They only see the marks, the percentage They assume he will need special support and are not willing to give it. Integration and inclusion? Bullshit.
Rahul has often been discriminated against, but we have tried hard to never let him feel that he is not as good as other kids his age. His school in Mumbai failed him twice in grade 9. We were told that they keep children like him till Grade 7 or 8 at the most because of the compulsions of the Right To Education Act, and then "wean" them off to special needs schools.
We approached the board and the school was made to take him back - not in Class 9 but in Class 10, because he hadn't failed! Throughout the year, there were subtle threats that if he did not perform well in the prelims, the school would not let him sit for the Boards. We survived all that.
We approached at least 8 to 10 schools in Gurgaon for admission. Not one had a vacancy for this child in mainstream Science. Rahul cannot work with the Humanities, nor is he comfortable with Commerce. He loves to watch fans move, lifts move, and wants to later study Electrical Engineering.
Rahul did written entrance tests for four of the schools we approached. Tests which were fitted for "normal" kids. He had to perform in these no matter that some of them were administered wrongly. One school gave a Technical Drawing test to be answered on ruled foolscap sheets and the instruments and drawing board were not provided. This school then went on to say that he hd not completed the Technical drawing paper. This school said that mainstream sciences were impossible, but for him, they would make special concessions - he would be allowed to go to the mainstream classes, appear for internal exams, but the board exam would be of the National Institute of Open Schooling (NIOS). And we would have to work with the NIOS curriculum at home on our own!! What sense did that make?
Another school said that ISC would not be an option, but they would admit him and give "a mixed bag" according to his likes... music, Technical Drawing -- a little bit of this and a little bit of that. Since he would require attention, they said, I was to go and sit with him and teach him all the time.
Two schools said his Class 10 marks weren't good enough and that the competition was too tough while one prominent one said that it was against their policy to admit new children in Grade XI. One school has assured us that they will contact us as soon as a vacancy arises in their special set-up. Their policy is to provide one- on-one care for every child with special needs. But Rahul doesn't need that.
One school said that their first term was already more than half-way done, so he would not be able to keep pace. Two schools said that they do not have the facilities to give him support, that it would be better to take him to another institution.
One gentleman berated me for trying to push him into mainstream school. His advice was that "these" children need to be "pushed into a vocation at an early age, to ensure they are able "to earn their living in white - collar jobs."
My child is capable of much more. He needs a chance.
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