She said that the husband "berated me for being sexist towards him."
A woman recently took to social media to share her disappointment after she got to know that her husband bought her engagement ring from their joint account. She said that they got married recently and the husband gave her a two-carat lab diamond ring worth $8000 (approximately Rs 6 lakh) on a payment plan, which allows payment to be spread out over a period of time.
Soon after getting married, the 28-year-old woman discovered that her husband was withdrawing money from their joint account to pay for the ring. "I found out after we married and merged our finances that he has been withdrawing funds from our joint account (we make roughly the same) to finance this ring. I was just taken aback and honestly put off by the fact he is making me pay for a GIFT he gave to me," she said on Reddit.
She said both of them have been having arguments about it. "He feels that ring is a wedding expense and it's only fair that I contribute towards it too, and that as a woman of this day I shouldn't hesitate to be an equal partner. I call bull**** and shared my thoughts on this whole thing."
The 28-year-old said that the receiver of the gift should not pay for it. "An engagement ring is considered a gift in most modern societies even today and I don't care if you disagree with that it's just what the cultural expectations are and we never discussed if he had any issues with that." She said that she has "unintentionally partially paid for 2 installments now which makes me a part-owner of the ring".
The Reddit user said that she would have not agreed to purchase the ring if she knew that the husband was going to ask her to pay. "Mutual consent is essential when a couple is deciding to invest in an asset. Owning a house or a car jointly requires two 'yeses' and I wouldn't certainly have said yes to jointly owning a ring he was supposed to give to me as a gift. So I can retroactively decide now I never wanted to own it and have been demanding that my husband returns the ring to the store if paying for the ring hurts his pocket so much."
She also issued a clarification and said that she would have appreciated it if he had discussed the buying of the ring. "However my then fiance; also knew about the expectation I had of him and was upfront about things from the get go. He could've discussed things with me like I mentioned earlier in my post and we could've seen if we were truly compatible like that," she continued.
The author of the post said that the husband "berated me for being sexist towards him." In conclusion, she said, "I put my foot down not because I can't afford it or I refuse to financially contribute or give my husband a nice gift, but my husband's sheer stubbornness and tackiness about wanting me to pay is what pisses me off. I don't mind splurging for him, but this whole situation has left a very bad taste in my mouth."
Since being shared, the incident has amassed a lot of reactions online.
"Yes agreed on all points like if they have a joint account that both their pay goes into how does she expect him to pay for a ring? Like none of this makes any sense," commented a person.
"Firstly, What did he do with the rest of the money? Because I don't think it cost $8k. I would be getting it valued and working out options. Secondly, if you (i mean you as a couple) can't afford it, why on earth is he spending $8k on a ring??? That is an absurd amount of money for a ring," said a user.
Another person wrote, "It sounds like you and your husband don't even like each other? Why on earth did you get married? Why did he need to, in your own words, 'get even' with you? Did you force him to buy a ring he couldn't afford? Something is definitely missing here."
A Reddit user commented, "If paying for something out of your joint account means you're paying for it indirectly, and that makes it not a gift, then neither of you can ever give each other gifts again. Your finances are MERGED. What's his is yours and yours is his. That's how my wife and I function anyway.
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