This Article is From Jan 18, 2015

All Patience and No Action, MI5 a Boring Place

All Patience and No Action, MI5 a Boring Place

Representational Image (Thinkstock)

London: Sitting around and no gunfights make the British secret service a dull place.

It is no James Bond's life at the British secret service for real as the latest attempt by MI5 to induct fresh recruits makes no mention of gunfights, massive explosions or seductive women.

In fact, the job specification is so undemanding that almost the only thing you need to be able to do is drive and talk at the same time.

If you can use an A-Z map (no sat nav) you will be well within a good chance to start a new career as a spy in MI5, the UK's domestic counter-intelligence and security agency.

The intelligence agency, which is advertising for "mobile surveillance officers" in its "operational" department, is determined that recruits must blend in while keeping a watchful eye on the enemy.

It all sounds a little bit routine, even boring. MI5 emphasises that recruits must be capable of exercising great patience -- without letting their guard slip, The Sunday Times reported.

No man can be more than 6 feet 1 inch and no woman over 5 feet 8 inch. The job description also rules out most tattoos unless they are well hidden.

"Any distinguishing features such as tattoos on your face, neck or forearms would make you more recognisable to someone who is under surveillance and would therefore make you unsuitable for this role," the agency says.

Crucially, applicants must be able to multi-task and "watch, plan ahead, drive, communicate to your team - and make decisions whilst you're doing so." So driving and talking are a must.

As the agency is looking for mobile surveillance officers, two of the basic requirements are that one has to be mobile and observant.

"You'll need to have good vision in both eyes...including full colour and peripheral vision. Good hearing is also essential," the agency says.

Applicants will need to feel comfortable "both walking and sitting for substantial periods of time".

Things can move fast, MI5 warns, so one has to be a competent driver with no more than six penalty points on their licence and be able to read a map. The pay is unlikely to draw too much attention.

Recruits start on 27,359 pounds, rising to 31,138 pounds when training is completed.

"You'll need to be able to remain completely alert for long spells of inactivity and then be able to step up several gears when it all starts happening," the agency says.