The world of modern dating has become quite a daunting place with a plethora of swipe-left rejections and an endless array of confusing signals. New terms and trends are emerging overnight, which makes it hard to keep up with what's considered acceptable and what's a major red flag.
One term that's gained traction recently is "future faking". The move is a manipulative tactic that can leave you feeling hopeful and invested in a relationship that's not quite real. But what exactly is future-faking, and how can you spot it in your dating life? Here's everything you need to know about this new dating term.
What Is Future Faking?
Future faking is when someone paints a vibrant image of a shared future without any real intention of making it a reality. This can include making grand promises early in the relationship and using long-term language before a solid foundation has been formed. They often express emotional certainty with an intensity that feels almost too good to be true.
What sets future faking apart from other manipulative tactics is its specific interest in exploiting hope rather than reality. The faker dangles the promise of a bright future in front of you to lure you in with the possibility of what could be rather than dealing with what is.
What Are The Signs Of Future Faking?
According to Psychology Today, these are the signs that you should look out for while dealing with a future faker:
- Promises are made but never fulfilled.
- They avoid concrete plans or deadlines.
- You're blamed for "ruining the mood" when you ask for follow-through.
- Grand gestures replace actual accountability.
- You're held responsible for the failure of future plans.
- Your life is stuck in a perpetual "someday" phase.
- You're promised that plans will work out "this time" if you return to the relationship.
- Conditions are imposed on you before your partner will follow through on their promises.
If you're worried about being future-faked, take a step back to assess the situation and gain clarity. In the early stages of romance, it's important to set the pace for the relationship. Set clear boundaries and avoid getting swept up in overly optimistic promises. To gauge your partner's commitment, ask specific questions like "I'd love to see these plans happen. What steps can we take to make this real?" and observe their response.
Pay attention to whether they perform actions or just offer more promises. It's also important to prioritise your own emotional health and recognise when it's time to reevaluate the relationship or walk away. Avoid self-blame and remember that you deserve a partner who follows through on their commitments.
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